Author: Joules Mer
Author's e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org
Author's URL: http://jmenterprise.popullus.net
Date: Written February 2, 2005 whist oblivious that Enterprise had been
cancelled even as I wrote.
Archive: Everyone else ask first.
Fandom: Star Trek Enterprise
Series: First in the Spam Series
Disclaimer: Enterprise is the property of Paramount. No profit
has been, or will be, made by this story.
"CONGRATULATIONS MR. REED!" Malcolm's eyes widened
at the salutation that leapt out at him. He almost erased the message,
but kept reading in spite of himself. "As someone at the height of
their earning power..." Earning power? What on earth was that?
"You are now eligible for our platinum plus supreme life insurance policy."
One corner of his mouth twitched upwards. "After a simple health and
risk assessment you could enjoy the peace of mind only our supreme plus (TM)
life insurance grants." Malcolm snorted. Risk assessment?
If they only knew. "Few are turned down so reply today to book your
Malcolm stretched his fingers and began to type.
"I'm most interested in your life insurance programme and would like to apply.
As an armoury and tactical officer in Starfleet I'm serving off world right
now on a deep space mission, but I'm sure our alien doctor would be happy
to forward the results of my latest physical. Please be assured that
I have fully recovered from being stunned and shot several times this past
year, and that all injuries suffered from being impaled whilst attempting
to defuse a bomb in a cloaked minefield were fully healed by an alien space
station. Please be advised it could take me some time to respond to
a reply. We're entering a section of Andorian space and may be running
silently while within their territory." Malcolm smiled and pressed
the send button. Trip would be proud of him.